What is in store for the future?

Dear Future-Self As of late you have been consumed by day-dreams, longing for a different life that I felt I should have had by this age but never accomplished. I wish I had a career I could be proud about, I wish I could have traveled to at least a few exotic places that I dream about and I wish I had a wife that was as much in love with me as I am with her. I question my future with my wife sometimes. I love her very much but I know in my heart that we are not meant for each other. I believe it is unfair that I love her more than she loves me and I hate myself sometimes for being a hopeless romantic. I wish she would look at me with the same amorous eyes as when we first met (again) what I would do to regain that look of love. Sometimes my soul feels empty, longing to be filled with something other than contempt for the world and all its problems. I wish I had a passion, epic goals or a worthy cause that would make my time on this earth memorable to the world. Lately all I ever do is day dream about winning the lottery or day dream about working in careers I know I will never get to partake in because of my physical disability. What does the future hold for a day dreamer such as myself? Sometimes I feel as if my life has been pre-determined already and I hate the fact that I feel powerless against whatever marionette strings that are controlling my destiny. Sometimes I feel as if I do not fit in the world that I live in. Sometimes I wonder if it is true about what someone had once said to me; I am predestined to be alone. I have always felt that no matter what I do, I can never establish relationships or friendships in a memorable fashion. Sometimes I hate myself because of who and what I am. I wish I could find other people like myself. Most of my life is a lie. I lie to others and to myself in order to protect my true self from those who may not accept me or to just simply fit in with the "in-crowd" but in truth I am much nicer than I look or allow myself to be. I always wish I had parents like everyone else, parents I could be proud about. My parents never gave me anything, not even the much important self-confidence one needs to establish one's self in the world. It seems as if I am destined for a less than mediocre life. I refuse to give up but no matter what I do to push myself, destiny is always to steps ahead in keeping me back. Hopefully in the years when you will receive this email, you would have made decisions that would improve your life from what it is now. Good luck past-me.