A sincere letter from me to me

Dear me of the future, how are you? I truly hope that you are doing well. You probably will not remember writing this letter but I remember loud and clear, but hey time moves on and does that to people doesn't it? I am writing this letter as a precaution to you. Just in case, if you are feeling down, let me make it even a little harsher for you, do something about it and when you set your mind to something, make sure you try your hardest at it, regardless of the outcome. I hope for your happiness and hope that you have found yourself just like i always have now. There will be people out there that you will regret not saying you loved them or cherished them and there will be people that you don't like that much. Forgive whoever it is and never hold any regrets, alright? I love biology at the moment and really hope that I got into that line of work, hahaha. I truly hope and am working on and continuously learning to find a cure to mum's somewhat 'incurable' condition and also chacha's conditions. Even if we cannot cure them, think of all the people we could help. Become this world's best biologist if you want to; through hard effort. Never forget to smell the roses or think that you are better than anyone and feel arrogant of that fact. I right now would have failed if that was the case. Love yourself and be confident but do not let other people feel down or something if you start blowing your own trumpet. Don't feel too depressed either, cause remember, hard work to change the circumstances will pull through. I wonder if you have a wife or at least have a significant other by then? I truly hope you found someone who can comfort you in your most painful and sad hours. Even if you don't, heck, you always have yourself. I found my wings to move on from my past which I had once wanted to block out completely. I love it with all my heart and let go of the me that was back then. Our past wasn't bad either, but helped us shape to who we are today. I am saying this to help you move past any regrets or pains that you may have felt over the years (I am turning 16 in a couple of days.) Your and my wills are indomitable, and unmovable. Heck, we managed to convert a masochistic, wanting to have people killed, over arrogant, insecure, detached from the world, cold to the bone, depressed and bored of life crybaby into who I am today. Just remember that it was with our effort and hard work that pulled it off, to become someone who loves a peaceful life, confident, peace loving, life loving, and etc. person I am at the moment. Be ok and cry if you need too. Nobody matters more than yourself. In the past, I did not have any friends and was always 'outshined' by our brother because of everything he always said. But, people like Farah, your best friend at the moment, and Alfred helped you and me to continue forth and soar. Thank the fact that you are alive, a miracle upon miracles. Take time to thank each person you cherish for being a part of your life. Thank them for everything nice and even not nice. They are your friends after all, so its alright to be honest with them. They won't abandon you nor should you feel that way anymore. I cannot do some of my dreams at the moment with IBDP coming up. I hope that by that time, your time, you will either start or have already completed them. 1. learn to dance awesomely. 2. learn to type at a ridiculously fast speed. 3. learn to sing even better. 4. learn how to draw manga and maybe publish a work or two. 5. learn how to programme. 6. learn how to animate. 7. get back into swimming. 8. have a very logically fit mind. 9. get back and learn how to play basketball. Of course, even if you do not do them its fine, cause you would probably have other priorities to attend to in your time. I do not have nor will have any regrets for not doing them. You do not need to feel obligated to feel that you need to fulfil them either. Just as long, my only wish that I want you to truly complete, is to make other people and yourself happy with acts of kindness, then you have accomplished a feat beyond my expectations. I love you and myself unconditionally, and never feel the need to exclude yourself or feel like there is some barrier between yourself and other people. You don't need to feel that way anymore. There will be people out there you can trust with all your heart and want you to stand next to them, literally and metaphorically. If you have not found people like that, even if just one, then you need better friends. Never ever forget your love of other people and of your love of god. But remember, it is not god who does the work so do not expect him at most times, to automatically solve anything for you. Its only through effort and human actions that things change... to a bright and ideal world. Well I guess that is all. I typed this message because of the fact that we almost died just a couple of days ago, even now, it felt like only a dream. It would probably feel even more distant by then. I hope that you appreciate life and see it even better and more beautifully than I do right now. Your life is important, and only you of then can make all the difference, I only set the changable stones anyways. My life is only once, you know. Happy new years. May it be a prosperous and love filled one. With love, Myself of the past.