A letter from August 11th, 2019

Peaceful right?

hey lex, it’s weird that I’ve already written 4 other letters but I feel the need to write more. This summer has been a roller coaster of emotions, we experienced some good, some bad, and some ugly. I’m trying to keep a positive attitude but it’s just been so hard lately, i spent my summer chasing after mark, i tried to hard to make us happen but he didn’t want me. He says he still likes me but he always makes mistakes and he doesn’t wanna put me through that or something ?? I haven’t texted him in almost a week but I called him yesterday to see if he could help me and isabel get our car unstuck but he said he couldn’t help and then hung up before I could say thanks anyway. I’m really hurt and I wish I didn’t feel this way. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do anymore, do I just wallow in self pity until my heart heals itself somehow ? I’m so lost and confused and I can only hope that we have our **** together by the time you get this letter. Oh also happy birthday ! make sure you get that tattoo over spring break unless you’ve decided not to then that’s fine! I hope that when I read this letter again I’ll be happier and that reading marks name won’t hurt. I’m praying for our happiness and I hope it finds us :) until we meet again, xoxo lex

Epilogue

about 2 months later

Hi lex :)

I remember that summer oh so clearly and i want to apologize for putting you through all of that hurt over a boy who doesn’t know what...

Oigdn he’s. Ni endo eht igong htat lwaeodlw tyip odgo zidlaree v’oeyu rheta, ouyr hlea bda eth asw ot efsl oyu tnilu afr uoy hitw( it of venre os ioecnxtep sy)da. Fo cebeusa ewke go ,pu iggntet gpa veol orf ayaw ’lli ew ehty rfo but tbu ot uro beark rwee’ our eluagrr oleclge rabek lief to itsh dna yoak im’ ’odtn kgniat eb ktinga nwet our uro btu asuec isllt ulfl rse’hte ! alsse,cs essslca mrof a solohc nad tkoo ruo dvoci do? reef es,asslc ertehgto oecegll ahev altycalu me we pgnris ti’s tmigh ew ehav ognig on of nnnsxtoieet is pdai erkab os ecisn. Si owh stni’ ot but :) nto attoot veersed sone ziledera ignog she’ neosmoe oeynmar we ti epexsvien tals pypha and ietgntg wiht eewdkne us eman m’i tbu repson ,inpiontdsgiap tno ucabsee mesa yte sm’ but ewer utp r’eew het dan woh onguisnfc peiecrd nreve tyeh egtitgn aridnge eth my !!! this to i ruht i’m be toends’. It fg ts’hta dgoo won eauecsb eh ’esh appyh so asebb, ta eh yaphp least os drveeess ssmee nad hsi ihtw. For saw neo keep bene gnitientesr na si’t hknat oru was u loas ): but seiw,hs phpness,ai aergt for het ybhdrati ti ygpianr it gnwriko. Pseael os all woh ispnuhg eekp to obaut ot toghuth iwsh uyo olcud adn dworfra thorugh we be i adn that sa 81 tpu kdain and wkon :) napi it rascy gailzoeop allery as sit’ nuf i is eth moer, erouy’ htru tgigten it’sn ugh nad towrh.
Ruo mi’ fro ainrpgy pnspa,ishe lstli.
Xel oox,x 3<.